Strange Attraction

The Cure - Strange Attraction

I've listened to this song on repeat the whole night.
Listen to it if you get the chance!
You'll definitely like it if you like the Cure.

It started with a dedication
"Lost in admiration
Happy birthday I'm forever yours
-Blossom"
Faded red inside a tiny book of butterflies
I smiled surprised at how when flickered through
The wings flew by spelled out my name...

Six months went by, the summer lost
Obessively the letters dropped into my life
The same soft blood smooth flowing hand
"Please try to understand
I have to see you
Have to feel you
Tell you all the ways I need you
Yours forever in love..."

Strange attraction spreads its wings
It varies but the smallest things
You never know how anything will change
Strange attraction spreads its wings
And alters but the smallest things
You never know how anything will fade

The year grew old incessantly
She wrote to me
She'd started smoking poetry
I laughed in recognition of a favourite phrase
She'd pulled me in...
I answered her
A christmas card in sepia
Arranging when and where
And how the two of us should meet...

Her opening so well prepared
A nervous smile
I couldn't take my eyes from her
She whispered
"Can I use some of your lipstick?"
It was perfect so believable
I couldn't help but feel that it was real
And kissing crimson fell into her waiting arms...

Strange attraction spreads its wings
It varies but the smallest things
You never know how anything will change
Strange attraction spreads its wings
And alters but the smallest things
You never know how anything will fade...

So, alone into the cold new year
Without another word from her
I wrote to ask if we could maybe meet again before the spring
But weeks went by with no reply
Until once more my birthday came
And with it my surprise
But this time nothing was the same...

"I'm sorry,
Blame infatuation,
Blame imagination,
I was sure you'd be the one but I was wrong
It seems reality destroys our dreams
I won't forget you
-Blossom"
Faded red inside a tiny book of old goodbyes...

Strange attraction spreads its wings
It varies but the smallest things
You never know how anything will change
Strange attraction spreads its wings
And alters but the smallest things
And you never know..

smoke-free. albeit only for a day so far.

16th of november was my birthday, i turned 19.
i think it was possibly the best birthday i've ever had so far.
i've always been the baby of the group, as i always hung around with people older than me, and it still is the case, but i feel very much like an equal with the current bunch of flatmates.

my flatmates, decided to put some money together to allow me to go and see placebo in december. i was very happy then, it was great. placebo, my favourite band!

also got loads of cards and some alcohol as well, seeing as how i'm supposed to be an alcoholic :P
i got drunk 4 times last week! 4 times in 1 week! it was quite extreme drunk as well!
i don't remember some of the things i did that week, i think i should cut down a little on the alcohol.

i was about to quit with the smoking and some of my friends bought me some cigars..
so that was postponed, until i finished the cigars yesterday. so now, i've promised to stop smoking. it's going to be hard, seeing as how i've been steadily smoking since i was 14. a 5yr long habit has to be stopped. for the past 2 weeks, i'd been smoking about 2-5 cigarettes a day in an effort to slowly ease myself off, coz before that, i'd been doing 15 a day.

also cleaned my room up, did my laundry. only realised that first term of uni is almost over, so i've decided i'm going to start studying properly soon. hopefully as soon as i finish this blog post.

also gonna go find a job, i think i've gotta get off the alcohol and drugs, and start putting my life on track again. hopefully the combination of work and study will keep me busy, enough for me to not get drunk 4 times a week :P plus, job = more money, and more money = more alcoh... lol

exams are not as far away as they seem!
i best get studying...

free stuff?

i get £100 shopping voucher if 5 ppl click on this and choose a gift they would like.
thanks in advance.

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hello again

hmm. i wonder how people will react and feel if i died?
it sounds really selfish but i want ppl to mourn my death for a long time and feel very very miserable. i think at the current rate, i won't have many ppl that will be v. v. upset, i will have a lot of ppl that will go "oh i knew hong... how sad".

hmm i want to find out. i wonder if there is a way to find out without actually dying, coz that'd be awesome.

my birthday is in 2 days!
but i'm gonna be celebrating it tonight!
there's gonna be a house party sort of thing, a lot of ppl from uni turned me down, they have classes tomorrow... its totally rational and fair, but being the selfish ass that i am i'd like to think that my birthday is more important that an hour of lectures at 9am in the morning. but it obviously isn't.

i still have about 20+ ppl pretty much confirmed to be coming. maybe that'll grow to about 60 like it did the last time we had a house party. i want it to be awesome, i want to drink, i want everyone to get drunk and i want to be drunk and i want everybody including myself to be happy.

given my recent behaviour, i think a lot of ppl won't want to be near me.
i may have done some drugs but i'm not a junkie.

oh and just so everyone knows, cocaine is no big deal, i did not feel anything.
speed is a different matter, but ppl have already started being upset with me and alienating me, so i think i'll stop with the speed/cocaine or any other drug.

well, can't quite stop the caffeine. cutting off the nicotine is hard enough as it is.

i've lost count of how many ppl i know have died this year, i best not add myself to the list.

tonight, i will be happy.

90s Music

I downloaded a whole lot of 90s music and found it so funny!
so nostalgic too.

i loved it when it was the mid 90s, i can easily say those were the happiest times of my life. i spend too much time thinking about the past lol. but facebook has worked wonders with me tracking down my old friends from primary school,
they're scattered all over the world, but i'm real chuffed that a lot of them still remember me, just 1 or 2 don't. and one of them i even fancied at one point, in year 5... just coz she's been on TV. what a slag. :P
oh well cant blame her if she doesn't remember me. but i remember being quite close to her, went to her birthday party. this was all back in year 5. still remember her address too. orange grove, stevens road, singapore...
not obsessing, just disappointed and i have a damn good long term memory.

the 90s songs i've listened to recently are all one hit wonder sort of songs.
u may not recognize the titles but u'll definitely recognize the music if u listen to em. they are:

kriss kross - jump (1992)
snow - informer (1993)
house of pain - jump around (1992)
chumbawumba - tubthumping ( 1997)
the wallflowers - one headlight (1997)
nicki french - total eclipse of the heart (1995)
US3 - cantaloop (1994)
des'ree - you gotta be (1994)
the rembrandts - i'll be there for you (1995)
bodeans - closer to free (1996)
deep blue something - breakfast at tiffany's (1995)
ini kamoze - here comes the hotstepper (1994)
tony rich project - nobody knows (1996)
rappin 4 tay - i'll be around (1995)
barenaked ladies - one week (1998)
gina g - ooh aah... just a little bit (1997)
mark morrison - return of the mack (1997)
no mercy - where do you go (1996)
cathy dennis - touch me [all night long] (1991)
montell jordan - this is how we do it (1995)
eagle eye cherry - save tonight (1998)
verve pipe - the freshman (1997)

they are some of the songs... will listen to more over time.